Aspiring to be the Tom Schwartz of the midwest.
Had Skip Bayless' phone number for two years but never called him.
I write things and run shit but most importantly I'm just a dude with a vision and a team of dope people to help make it happen.
I'm a realistic Dallas Cowboys fan aka a walking oxymoron.
My idols include: Tony Romo, Avril Lavigne, and Neal Caffrey.
If the cocktail doesn't have more than 4 ingredients, it's not for me.
Once stood toe to toe with world renowned luchador Ultimo Dragon.
Shook hands with Alex Rodriguez, that's neat.
I was neighbors with Grammy Award winning Jazz/Gospel artist Smokey Norful for 10 years.
I'm the soccer guy and I dabble hard in reggaeton. Call me a student of the world.
Here to provide [un]biased opinions about Russell Wilson, Sergio Busquets, Bad Bunny, and King Messi.
Visca el Scarves & Stripes.
I work at GrubHub so whenever you're drunk or high and want food, that restaurant you order from is probably me.
Otis Wilson of the '85 Bears came to my 7th birthday party.
Pineapple does belong on pizza. Fight me.
Brian asked me to become CFO one day and I assumed that meant Chief Financial Officer.
I was once on an episode of MTV's True Life and told my girlfriend she looked like Alfalfa. She's no longer my girlfriend.
Working at The Hub Chicago to get the networking I need for MTV to give me a spin-off.
I'm the proud owner of a hole in one.
Really want to catch a foul ball one day just to give it to a kid.
If the body is 80% water, then mine is 50% beer.
Getting a vasectomy soon, kids are too damn expensive.
Attempted to throw a party so big in high school it ended up on Craigslist.
The king of knowing where every NBA player went to college.
My name is Tommy Toothpicks but you can just call me a winner.
Don’t let the fact that I’m the oldest member of the crew fool you.
I was on stage rocking with Pearl Jam at the final concert ever at the Chicago Stadium.
I’ve attended events run by 14 different professional wrestling promotions in the last 14 months...and counting.
And the topper? Smoked cigars with Tupac in an Atlanta nightclub during Freaknik. Just me, Pac, and a few fresh Macanudos.
Self-Proclaimed Director of White Sox morale and Rick Hahn Fan club
To quote Riff Raff, “I’m a big fan of snacks and things of that nature”
Known as a habitual line stepper
Eagerly awaiting for medical science to develop cybernetic livers
Batman could whoop Superman any day of the week.
I am a proud owner of both Tyler Colvin and Brett Jackson shirseys.
I believe the Dillon Panthers are the best football team ever to play the game.
I hate everything about the Bulls front office and I will support Mitch Trubisky until Chicago radio callers stop their nonsense.